Still got some teenage angst in me yet


This post is brought to you by Everclear.

Jessica Stanley is guiltier as Lauren Mallory. While Lauren is the obvious bitch in the story, it is clear that she is insecure and shallow. Jessica is more unassuming. While she does not throw the barbs, she does nothing to stop them from striking. I feel for Jessica, because I was once Jessica. Easily swayed and foolish.

This is serious post. Just a forewarning. When I was in junior high I became friends with a really great girl, J. To this day she is probably the sweetest girl I have ever met. She was funny and nice as could be. She did however have Cerebral Palsy. Not bad enough to inhibit her walking but bad enough that it was quite noticeable. For this reason she was a bit unpopular. At the time it didn’t matter because I was too. We spent a lot of time together and I even joined drill team because she did it. Of course like a lot of friendships that occur at this time, something happened. High School to be precise. At some point during my sophomore year in high school I began to make new friends. Started dating boys, going to parties. Suddenly I didn’t have time for my friend that i would watch Sailor Moon with. It was never an intentional thing, it just happened. I was fifteen, sitting in the hot tub drinking stolen mikes hard lemonades with some new friends. At some point a friend made a rude comment about J. In that moment I could have corrected her, shamed her for saying things about the sweetest girl I had ever known. But I didn’t. Instead I chuckled half heartedly and took a big pull off my drink. This moment was a defining one for me. After that I was in the in crowd, or at least on the outskirts. I had a new group of friends; prettier and intimidating. How could my friendship with J last? Although we went to the same small high school and graduated at the same time. After that party I don’t think I spoke more than five word to her. The consequences of me standing by still haunt me. I don’t think my friendship mattered enough to J to hurt her when it was gone. But knowing that I had basically abandoned a quality friend in lieu of shinier models, it bothers me to this day. When I look back on those days, I feel just as responsible for any pain she suffered, than if I had said those words myself. Sometimes standing by while some one is being hurt leaves you just as culpable.


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